The Parents’ View: When the Mobile Phone Takes a Seat at the Table

Discover the perspective of Rocío Trianes, a parent at our school, on children and mobile phones.

Once again, the iPad on the table while we eat? I’ll admit it: this scene repeats itself far more often than I’d like, and at increasingly younger ages. And every time it happens, I feel I’m not alone. I know many parents at the school are going through something similar. It’s not just a battle between adults and children, but an ongoing conversation at home: how to live with screens without letting them take over.

The concern is shared. More and more, we find ourselves talking with other families about the overuse of devices and the impact they have on our children’s daily lives. Because yes, we notice it: less outdoor play, less reading, more distractions and, at times, fewer conversations. We also worry about sleep, attention, exposure to inappropriate content, or the dreaded cyberbullying.

And these are not just impressions. Data from official organisations, as well as psychologists and neurologists, confirm that too much screen time can disrupt sleep, increase irritability and reduce face-to-face social interactions. And in an environment as diverse as ours, balancing routines and digital habits is not always easy.

But the big question remains: what do we do about it? How do we support our children without falling into excessive control or total permissiveness?

This is not about declaring war on technology. We live in a digital, interconnected world, and that is not going to change. We cannot ignore this when educating our children. What we can do is help them use technology meaningfully, so that it serves them — and not the other way around.

And of course, the classic lines always appear: “All my friends have a phone, Mum. I’m the only one who doesn’t know what’s going on.” We all recognise that one. And then come the doubts, the comparisons and even the guilt: the school uses iPads, their friends already have one, someone gave it to them without asking… But in the end, the decision is made at home. It is us, the parents, who need to set boundaries and guide them in their digital learning.

Experts recommend delaying personal mobile phones until children are 12 to 14 years old, or at least until they show enough maturity to manage one responsibly. But every family is different, with their own needs and reasons for using them (for example, geolocation), and there is no single solution. What truly matters is being informed, talking about it at home and acting consistently.

And we shouldn’t see the school as the enemy. In my view, we should see it as an ally. There is a “code of good practice” for device use that pupils know, and it can also serve as a helpful guide for us at home.

Technology, when used well, can be a powerful tool: it opens the door to knowledge, encourages creativity and connects us with the world. But for it to truly be that, we need dialogue, boundaries and support.

I genuinely believe this is a challenge we cannot and should not face alone — but ignoring it won’t make the risks disappear.

Families and the school are part of the same team. If we move forward together, if we share criteria, if we support one another, we can offer our children what they need most: an education that prepares them to live with balance, discernment and humanity in a world full of screens.

Rocío Trianes
Mother of Year 2 and Year 5 pupils